Real Power in Your Relationship

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word,

a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring,

all of which have the potential to turn a life around."

Leo Buscaglia

I recently read Dr. David Burns' book Feeling Good Together, and there were a lot of helpful ideas in it.  However, what is standing out for me today is the challenge he set himself.  He challenged himself to give 25 compliments in a week. 

Could you do it?

Twenty five real compliments in a week to anybody- the teller at the bank, a stranger on the street, the guy who makes your morning coffee, your kids- anybody.  That's a little under 4 a day.  Think you could do it?

• "Hey, that's a great tie."
• "You have a nice smile."
• "That was fast!  You rock."
• "You did a great job on that drawing."

How about you do it this coming week?  And pay attention to what happens.

You might be surprised at the great reactions.  Sadly, the people you compliment may be surprised, too.  I see it all the time when I give a compliment; people seem a bit flustered.

Now comes the hard part.  After you do a week of 25 "anybody" compliments; spend a week finding 25 ways to compliment your partner.  Yes, your partner! 

They can't be corny compliments- you have to mean them seriously.  And don't over-do it "That was the bestest, most wonderful, over-the-top, fantastic... (I hope you get the picture.)"  Make the compliment real and believable- that makes it much more powerful.

Your courageous work is to do the two 25 weeks- a week of complimenting anyone, then a week of complimenting your partner.  If you want to ramp the challenge up- practice just saying "Thank you" when you are given a compliment.

Let us know what the effect is.

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