Always acknowledge, amplify, apologize, articulate, and ask.

In the first installment of the "Awesome Alliterations for Rewarding Relationships" I thought I'd be mundane and start with "A".  Besides, I don't have a good drawing of Cthulhu for my "C" post, yet (I'm working on it!)

So...
Always...

Acknowledge.  Make sure you recognize when your partner does something good or something you like or something you asked them to do.  (This is true with kids, too.)  What you recognize and focus on will happen again.  Would you rather it be the good things or the bad?

Amplify.  Don't just "mention" the good things, amplify them.  While you give a compliment focus on giving it and having it be received.  Take a moment to make sure it sinks in.  What you say will be better heard and remembered if you do this.  Trust me, I use it all the time with clients- it works.

Apologize.  If you make a mistake, own up to it and apologize.  Don't avoid it and act like it didn't happen.  Don't wait to be caught.  Stand up for all your decisions and apologize.  However, apologies aren't just about words.  If you say "I'm sorry," but your attitude is "get over it" you aren't really apologizing.  Your remorse needs to be really tangible.

Articulate.  Open your mouth and speak your truth, no matter how uncomfortable that is for you.  Don't stuff your feelings or your thoughts- you aren't being fair to your partner if you aren't being you.  Take time to think about what you say and how you say it so you can articulate yourself clearly rather than confuse your partner.  But make sure you say it.

Ask.  Talk about what you want, what you like, what you don't like- and ask you partner to help with these things. Ask for help and be willing to receive it.  Ask the questions you want answers to.  Ask what your partner is thinking.  If you want to know what they are thinking about you- ask that.  Make sure you are clear with your questions, too.  

Your courageous work? Learn to acknowledge, amplify, apologize, articulate, and ask.  Oh, and go to the original post and give me more wonderful ideas for alliterative phrases about relationships!

Please email me with ideas or questions.  You can find my email on my profile page.

The awesome alliterations are inspired by this artist.