Snow on the beach and relationships

I took a nice long walk with Thor today on the shoreline. It was strange to see snow on the beach, but I'm not sure why. I guess because the beach is always associated with summer and hot weather. Well, living at this NJ beach has taught me that's not always true.

It's like assumptions people make about relationships.
They assume the image of a perfect relationship given to them by society is true. Like the always summer beach, the always happy relationship doesn't exist.

No beach has perfect weather all the time, even in the tropics. Hurricanes come, or nor'easters like we had here a few days ago. The waves pound the sand, the winds steal your breath away, and the fury humbles even the most grandiose.

So it is in relationships- arguments which seem small may blow up into major storms. Both of you may be surprised at the vehemence you feel, but if you work it right, the fight can be a boon to your relationship.

How?

Well, take our beach for example. Although people complain about "loss of beach" from the storms, all the waves do is move the sand around. They actually smooth the high slopes humans have unnaturally placed along the shore.

This happens in your relationship when you disagree or become disconnected. If you can scout the source of the "high slope" between you two, then you can discover a way to smooth it out. Usually this is done through compromise, communication, and good listening.

You see, snow on the beach may seem unexpected, but not if you think about it. Unhappy times in relationships may seem incorrect, but they are really indicators of unrealistic expectations (as set by society) and a need to smooth things out.

Your courageous beach work is to really challenge the expectation that things in your relationship should always be sunny, and look at how you can work with your partner to create a better slope between you.