Often people are stuck because change is difficult. However, look at the consequences of “can’t.” Where will the choice to not do lead you? Is it a better place? Is it really easier? If people are honest, the unhealthy choice, in the long run, is, well… unhealthy and leads to negative things. Once you truly recognize how much “can’t” is harming your life, you may start to chose “can.” Difficult as it is, the change in the long run is easier than remaining stuck.
Another way I see people caught in the cycle of can’t is they are waiting. They wait for insight or motivation to make them want to change or take a different path. Fortunately, you don’t have to know why something works to do it; in fact, as someone said to me recently, “motivation follows action.” It is in doing something different we come to see how it helps. I tell my clients insight is a wonderful thing, but behavioral changes are what create a healthy life.
The lyrics of a Rush song state, “Even if you chose not to decide, you still have made a choice.” By not choosing, you are actually making a choice for can’t.
On February 12th, Lincoln’s birthday, think about the choices Abe made each year of his life. Despite adversity, despite not knowing exactly how it would end, and despite having to do things whether he felt like it or not, he moved forward. He chose can.
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